13 Ways I Get In My Own Way

I’ve noticed a trend lately. You, the beloved readers of this site, tend to respond more positively to the posts that highlight my weaknesses.

Thanks for the encouragement…I think.

With that in mind, I thought I’d once again dig down deep into the archives of my personal experience. I want to share some of the ways (there’s probably a lot more) that I have missed the mark for no other reason than…me. I was rolling along nicely – growing and learning. Then suddenly I ran into a wall of my own making.

The good news is I’ve learned something from each of these self-inflicted actions. Sometimes you need to get out of your own way so you can move forward. Perhaps you’ll see yourself in one or two of these…

1. I don’t do anything. I hope there will be some cosmic force that causes things to work out on their own.

2. I wait for just the right moment. To me, the right moment is a combination of feelings, environmental conditions, and personal mojo. Unfortunately, it rarely arrives.

3. I don’t really want to change in order to grow. I’d rather just read, write, think about, reflect on, and even analyze it instead of doing the hard work of actually changing.

4. I’m not flexible enough. This is probably true both physically (I need to stretch more) and mentally (I need to stretch more).

5. I’m not accountable. It’s funny how the need for independence can quickly lead to isolation.

6. My inner dialogue isn’t helping. Thinking about how many statements in my head start with: “but…”, “I can’t…”, “if only…”, and “wait…”.

7. I don’t have a clear picture of what I want or need to do. And if that picture is blurry, then my day-to-day tasks will be fuzzy as well.

8. I’m unmotivated. This means I’ve lost touch with things like passion, meaning, purpose, and significance. It also stems from becoming a bit too self-centered.

9. I’m undisciplined. The inner slacker finds a way to do anything but the thing I need to be doing.

10. I want it now. And if I can’t have it now, I’m not willing to walk through the process to arrive or achieve or accomplish it later.

11. I work toward comfortable instead of working through uncomfortable.

12. I don’t finish. Truth is, if I don’t finish then starting doesn’t count.

13. I compare. I compare the best in others to the worst in me and I always come up short.

Are you depressed yet? I know I am. I don’t want to be the person described in that list. I hope you don’t want to be that kind of person either.

So I encourage you to do the opposite. That’s what I’m working on. Go back through the list and ask yourself, “What would the opposite of this be?”

And then do that.


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  1. Wow, Tim, talk about depressed. I felt as if you were describing my diary. (Not that I have one.)But for me, I feel it’s easier to read how lazy or unwilling I am than to change it because changing myself does take work and no one else sees the results. I know changing should just be for me, but it’s nice to know it’s working sometimes.

    1. Author

      Jasmine. Thanks for the comment. I think the initial awareness might be depressing, but the minute we start to do the opposite it becomes inspiring.

      And I don’t have a diary either…just a blog 🙂

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